I was filling up the mainland vehicle (2006 Highlander Limited) when I saw a clapped out early 60's Impala rumble (shake/cough/rattle/gasp/wheeze) it's way to the pumps nearby. Kid got out, maybe 18, looked like Kid Rock's illegitimate son (wife beater shirt, pale skinny arms, flat bill Monster Energy hat, and a trash 'stache).
Car looks like it was just pulled from a field. Rust everywhere. Might have been gold once, but there's so much primer I can't tell. Rough hood opening with a faded silver tunnel ram intake sticking up, rattling around from how badly the engine is idling. Wheel were a mismatch of slot mags on the rears and steelies (should have had hubcaps, or centers and trim rings I'd think) on the front. And the rears were Kelly Super Chargers, white letter and from 30 feet away I could see the cracks from dry rot.
He started filling up, standing right by the nozzle and lit up a smoke (dumb). Reached into the car and got his big can of Monster.
I heard another (better) sound, and saw a white Corvette Z06 glide its way to the pump on the other side of the kid.
Corvette driver got out, and somehow they got to talking about their cars.
Kid says "Yeah, it was my uncle's. '64 Impala SS, 283, 2 speed power glide, 3500 stall converter. I put a dual 4 manifold from a 283 'Vette on it, has Holley 650 double pumpers and a tunnel ram. Cut the hood opening myself."
'Vette guy is not real impressed, says "Yeah, I see that. Cool."
Kid says "So what do you have under the hood?"
'Vette guy says "It's a Z06, but I had a larger supercharger installed, Borla exhaust, a short shifter and the heads CC'ed, ported and polished. Stock it was 650 horsepower but now I'm probably putting down over 700. Haven't had it dyno'ed."
Kid isn't impressed either. Says "Yeah, that's cool. Since mine was an SS, I probably had 500 stock. But then I put the Corvette dual fours intake on, the Holley double pumpers and opened up the exhaust (I'm sure he did that, not the fact that the pipes had rusted). I've probably got over 650 now, maybe even 700."
'Vette guy laughs a little, says "Son, that small block of yours couldn't make over 400, and that's with forced induction."
Kid gets a little insulted, says "Yeah? Well, my uncle told me he used to run this car at Norwalk (30 miles away) and the smaller engines were better in the quarter mile. Higher revving. Big block weigh too much and only have low end torque. All that can do is smoke your tires. Smaller engines have higher redlines and RPM's are where the speed is."
'Vette guy (who I'm sure rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses) said "Well, I hate to tell you, but torque gets you out of the hole. If you've got the right set up you won't have to worry about traction."
They're both finished fueling at this point, and the kid says "Alright. You want to see who's faster?" Gestures to the stop light right on the corner, Rt. 53 4 lane road 55 MPH speed limit.
'Vette guy says "No, wouldn't be fair."
Kid says "Yeah. Not fair, TO YOU! You don't want to race since you know you'll get beat."
I was done filling up and didn't stick around to see if they actually went out and raced.
But if I'd been the 'Vette guy I would have, at least up to the speed limit, just to show him. I also would have asked "How do you know that was an SS, since the fenders are so rusted the emblems are gone?"
Kind of looked like this guy, except he didn't have the knit cap, the hair, or the pants on. No BMX either, he had his uncle's (2 tone primer and gold) '64 Impala SS 283.
And for those who don't know what a trash 'stache is, its that fuzz on the lip that kids wear to try and look older/cooler/tough. Ends up making them look younger/douchier/wimpier.